I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Success! We fucked roommates!
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