glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
