WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Randomize
