we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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