I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
