PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
