he puts the penis in happiness.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
