So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Randomize
