Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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