I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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