If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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