i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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