I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize