I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
