the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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