The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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