I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
