all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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