I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
