Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Randomize
