I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
