Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
