Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
