I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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