she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
