It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
