It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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