i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
