The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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