That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
