mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
