can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
