Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
