I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I AM VODKA MAN
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize