Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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