SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize