I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
