Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
