Only a mothe r could love this liver
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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