He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
