wat bout pragnant strippers??
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
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