My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
