Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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