hotel room ftw
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Randomize
