So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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