1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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