You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
