there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
operation harelip BJ is a go
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
