I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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