whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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