My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
